Basic
Goodwill Building Philosophy
This course is about how to communicate effectively -- that is, to get what you want; it is not about what you think or feel or what is right or wrong. What follows is not intended to change the way you think or feel about other people; it's not intended to "make you a better person" but only to make you a better communicator, someone who is able to work effectively with the largest number of people.
1) Differentiate between "intending
goodwill" and "building goodwill". When you assume, you
make an "ass" out of "u" and "me".
~ Do not assume the audience shares your biases.
~ Do not build
goodwill with one person or group at the expense of another person or group.
~ Omit anything that might be offensive.
~ When trying to build goodwill, the best intentions may lead to disastrous outcomes.
~ Become aware of your own biases and learn to tread softly.
~ Carefully monitor your reader's response (when possible), and apologize if you
think they feel disrespected.
2) This is a pragmatic, not a moral, lesson.
~ Treating your audience with respect is the most effective means of getting what you want. Treating them with disrespect is the fastest means of failing to get what you want.
~ If you develop
a reputation for associating more effectively with one kind of person or group,
you immediately limit your overall range of effectiveness.
3) Men really are from Mars; women are from Venus.
~
Do not assume both genders communicate the same way.
~
Be sensitive to differences even if you don't like "their way."
~
Guys: avoid sarcasm and hazing!
~
Women: expect men to be dorks. Be frequently forgiving.
4) Follow the Golden Rule: "Do unto
others. . . ."
~ Ideally, your goodwill is sincere and not just a business strategy.
~ Make sincere
attempts to see situations from your reader's perspectives.
~ Trust that
kindness is usually rewarded in kind, eventually.
~ From a
pragmatic standpoint, you will get what you want more easily and frequently when
all the players get what they want.
4) Greased wheels spin smoothly. Nature
rewards optimists.
~ And so does capitalism.
~ Most of us hope to succeed at achieving our goals, and we are simply looking out for people who will help or hinder us.
~ Building goodwill largely means showing others that your
goal is to help them achieve their goals.